Dating best friend break up
In fact, it was one of the key pillars of girl power.
While our mums’ generation was taught that snaring a mate was priority number one for girls once they left the playground, we were sold quite the opposite message.
Whether for good reasons or superficial, knowing you have your mates' approval can help you feel more content.
Yes, according to Louisa, 28, whose best friends took an instant dislike to her new boyfriend.
I’d take months-long trips to the United States, sleeping in his apartment, burrowing into his life instead of living my own. ” Then, two years ago, Brian started seriously dating someone. When I flew from Pakistan to visit him in Ohio, at his request, he’d ask for alone time with his boyfriend.
He was my constant, the one thing I knew I could always rely on. “I feel like I’m being replaced,” I said to Brian after months of this game.
It’s a question to quake even the strongest friendship, whether it’s a new haircut, a big career move or a new significant other – but especially the last one.
Because if the honest answer is anything other than affirmative squealing, things get awkward.
Prioritising great friendships over a mediocre relationship; that still stands up, even if our faux Buffalo boots from down the market do not.
"They never slagged him off directly, but would raise their eyebrows or go ostentatiously quiet whenever I talked about him," she remembers. While letting your friends scare you off a new datemate could mean missing out on the love of your life, the opposite situation – friends who think the sun shines out of your SO's arse – can present just as many problems.
"He’s shy, and they made no effort to get to know him or enjoy his company. For a while, I really thought I was making a massive mistake."A few years on, it’s Louisa’s friends who are long gone. I was so hurt that they wouldn't even try to engage with this person I loved," she says. Not least when you start doubting your own instincts."Everybody loved Alan," says Rachel, 33. But over time he became possessive and jealous – quietly and behind closed doors.
The trouble is, our mates are so often navigating their own emotional maze – particularly in our 20s and 30s, when it can feel as though every choice people make is a pointed comment on your own – that sometimes it can be hard to know where friendly concern ends and other people's insecurities begin.
Is it your friends dislike, or something they represent?